My life... and all that goes with it: October 2010

Sketchabilities Sketch #34 Reveal

I am SO excited to show you this Sketchabilities sketch!
This time it's number 34!

I really liked all the layers with this one a lot! I used photos of D&I
on our romantic mini-vacation! I really like the way this turned out!

supplies used: Kaiser Craft papers; Making Memories; Sewing; Crate Paper; MME; Martha Stewart; CM corner rounder; AC pop dots; Studio Calico.

I really loved that trip, a lot. It makes me long for another get-a-way very soon!
I hope that you and your hubby if you're married get time like this too!

Go check out what everyone else did as well as trying the newest sketch!!! Have fun with it and fun with your day!

Life.

My gram went to the doctor. She did in fact have stroke but is doing better every day. Thank you for your prayers.

I have been in an interesting mood as of late. I am not sure what is going on! I am calm but frustrated too... Weird huh?

Its Thursday! What does that mean? Its our busy day today. Running A around everywhere.

And we've all made our Xmas lists! Let the shopping begin! :) I love Christmas.

Hope your Thursday is going really well!

Her.

I constantly second guess myself.

I make choices or do actions that I second guess thinking that one day she would end up in some bible study crying her eyes out because of what her mother had done. It is one of my biggest fears, being completely honest with you. Oh. I know I am not alone. I have heard countless amounts of other moms feel the same way.

We want what is best for our children. We want them to live a different life than the one we had growing up. We want to do right by them, and want them to almost live in a perfect world too. I know I do.

And if I am sitting here being really honest it is hard to let go. It is. When you first become a parent you want to shelter them from everything. And you do it within your power. Then as they grow you seemingly continue down this path because it is all you've ever known or done with your children. Then one day you wake up and they are a teenager. Although my life was very different from Alyssa's, I remember being a teenager. It was hard. And I had a mom that really just wanted me to grow up and be out of her hair. But me? I find myself lost so many times because I still feel the need to shelter. To protect. To be over-protective.

And I am always reminded about a talk I had with a women in church one day... She talked about having to let her child go. That as much as she wanted to keep them all bundled up inside of the glass jar, that as they lay there in her protective cocoon, that eventually they will turn into a butterfly and need to be set free. At the time, I really thought it was touching but not being where she was with her children I didn't pay much heed to it. Until of course years later when I realized one day that Alyssa was growing, changing, and most of all becoming her own person. And here I was clutching her so tightly and continually wrapping her up in this tight cocoon, I simply didn't see her wings trying to push through.

Yes.. Yes.. I know it is my job to protect her. And Lord knows in today's times, it is imperative that we ensure that we are protecting our children. But I was doing what I never thought I would... Which was not meeting Alyssa where she was. And I realized I didn't know how to do that. I was stuck. Still in protective mode. Even in the times when I would say "please be good" and she said, "mom when have I not been good?". Of course driving away, I realized what she said was true. And even though it is still my job as her mom to continue to worry, fret, help, and whatever else I am to do I realized that she had come out of her cocoon and I was still picturing her in it. The beautiful butterfly was sitting on its perch, patiently waiting. But for how long?

It is time. Time to open up the jar and allow her to fly. And it isn't for selfish reasons on why I kept her in the jar. I want to protect her from every. single. thing. out. there. Don't we all? But... I must let her chose. I must let her make her own steps. I must allow her to fall and fail too.

And I will admit, I don't know how. But I know the Lord does. So I have to entrust my daughter to the Lord. After all, she is his anyway. But of course flesh takes over in myself and I think well she is completely mine. And in humanistic terms this is true. However he loves her, cares for her, and has her best interest at heart. Sending her into the world will only mean he will be watching her completely and utterly. Sure he does this now. He always has. But as I give Alyssa fully to God, this means no more being overly paranoid. No more thoughts that she'll be sitting in a bible study bawling her eyes out because of some damage I did or something I didn't do for her..

I know this seems like she's leaving or something like that. Nope. I just scrapped a layout about her. And I am gently reminded that I must let go. Not completely of course. But I must be willing to lift the lid, allow her to fly. To become her own young woman.

So my prayer is that I am able to meet her or be a step ahead of her when she takes flight. I want to enjoy the journey as she grows. Not be stuck or cause her to be afraid to fly and flutter.

If you click on it, it will be more clear. Not sure what happened when I posted this.

The layout? It isn't anything major. It's just a gently nudge and wake-up call that my little girl is growing and spreading her wings. And I want to fly with her. I want to cherish the right here and now. To watch her flutter her wings....

The weekend.

What an interesting weekend. Friday I had to work the PM shift, which wasn't a big deal since we had done our major cleaning on Thursday this past week. That meant it was pretty low-key. I appreciated that. After work, I went over to Lori's house for some much needed girlie time. I hadn't been able to connect with her as of late and we both needed it. She surprised me with one of my favorite meals from Huckleberry's and we talked until very late into the night. It was wonderful. We laughed and shared our stories of our week. I came home and D was waiting up for me and we played Lego HP on the Wii {hopelessly addicted. Although I have to share that Harry looks awfully angry in this one!} and then went to bed.

Saturday we woke very early to go to the gym. He had to do PT and I just rode with him. I normally work out on Sat {Sat-Wed} so it wasn't a big deal, but with the weather being the way it was, I didn't want to go. But it did feel good to go and workout. We came home and instantly rushed to go get A from a sleepover and carry her to her youth theater commitments. There was this parent meeting for crew {which is what A is doing this time around, working backstage} and D went to it last year and they didn't even discuss crew at all, so D said we weren't going. We dropped A off and came home. D worked on our newly acquired thermostat {the programmable kind} and it ended up not working. So we actually had to go buy one. We forgot my wallet and had to go back to the house 2 times before getting Alyssa... What a mess! We were late getting her and then ran to HD. We stood there and teetering on getting the closet organizer now. We used our caculator to figure out how much money it was going to take. We almost bought it, but I decided that now wasn't the time. We live to save up for stuff like that with the things we want and then go and buy it. And we could have, but that meant it wouldn't of been with specific funds. So I told Dayv we weren't going to get it now. It isn't going to cost that much for us because our closet is only a step-in kind with sliding doors. But we still want something nice and to be organized. We came home and Dayv started working on the thermostat. For some reason it took him a really long time. He was frustrated and I tried to help. When he snapped at me, it was then I took A's hand and we just prayed for him and left him alone. The heater wouldn't work for some reason after he had it all hooked up. The poor guy he was so upset! But he kept his cool, which was good. He later told me after saying some not nice things in his head, he prayed and let it go! LOL. We then cleaned up the house a bit, played a bit of HP again and went to bed.

I felt like all we did was run around on Saturday and normally we stay close to home and veg. I wake up Sunday feeling icky and tired! How is that? We go to sleep and wake up feeling just as tired? Weird. D didn't go to the gym with me, but he said he just wanted to stay home today. So we skipped church and made a huge breakfast and just hung out as a family. Which was right up our alley. Especially learning what I did about my gram. I must admit, I bawled my eyes out. It was a very nice relaxing day, we needed it.

I didn't post my grateful list for this past week:

1. Making warm dinners that warm your heart.
2. Alyssa's support if I've had a bad day. How she'll come hug me and rub my back saying the sweetest things.
3. Crying out to the Lord and instantly feeling comforted. It is in that comfort that my tears of sorrow dry and joy comes.
4. Good friends who go the extra mile when you need them too.
5. The stillness of the morning. I love it.
6. Books. Because you get zapped into another world, another reality and live it through it!
7. Hot tea. I drink a lot of it during this time of year and every single sip tastes wonderful!
8. My puppies. How excited they are to always see me after I've gone someplace.
9. The way I feel when Dayv hugs me. He holds me tight and it makes me feel safe.
10. New pj's.

Hope you have a wonderfully blessed week!

My gram.

I just got the news...

My gram had another mini stroke. She has had them and a big stroke a while ago.

She is 87. I know that at this point most people would say well she is 87 and lived a great life. That much is true, however she is still here. Still my gram. And still is living.

This time though it has robbed her of being able to speak a sentence. She seems befuddled and does not know certain things if you ask her.

I will know more tomorrow.

If you could please say a pray for my gram. Her name is Patricia.

I would appreciate that so very much.

The switch and life.

*We finally got our new books in. Algebra and Physical Science. So far so good. The Physical Science is a huge hit in our home because we all love science, a lot.

*We went to a very good friend of mine's {Lori} church this past Sunday. A-mazing. We had gone there the week prior as well and I have been there a handful times myself but the spirit was a movin' in that building on Sunday! It was a very good service, very good indeed!

*This past weekend I heard the most wonderful thing. It isn't new of course, but it was wonderful indeed. Someone said to lean against the Lord. Normally we are told to lean upon, which is basically the same thing but it meant something so different to me. Leaning against the Lord means I have a mental picture of me leaning up against him. I don't know why this brings me such great comfort but it does. I like that idea of leaning into the Lord. It makes me feel warm, wanted, and cherished.

*All week long I've been smelling my mom. Call me weird but its true. I could literally smell her. I felt her close, which was nice. I miss her.

*I want to put crown moulding in our den, both bathrooms and Alyssa's room. I want to put in an organizer for our closet. I want to paint our bathroom vanity, make a frame for our mirror, and put in a closet organizer in there too.

*Our new furniture will be here on the 26th! It's about time!

*One of my new favorite snacks... Raisins and cashews. Although I try not to eat it too much since the nuts are high in everything!

*I've been journaling. You know, handwriting journaling? Imagine that. It is something I've always wanted to do and never even got past 2 pages. But I gave a journal to Alyssa and its in her curriculum now {cause i put it there! :)} so I told her if she did, I would. I am not hard on myself if I don't do it daily, but I have been keeping it up.

*I joined a book club. The book we're going to read is called "Fear No Evil" by Robin Caroll. I have no clue what its about, but its sitting here staring at me in the face. I am still reading another book {the last in the series} so hopefully I'll get to this one soon.

*I did this layout about our trip to Seattle. It was fun.

*I had the worst day ever today at work. Seriously. I just don't get it, this is supposed to be an easy job people! I can't say it enough.. It is one of the most hardest jobs I've ever had. I am still waiting for the Lord to show me my purpose there...

*Sometimes I wish I wasn't an emotional eater. These days I am a lot better than I was, but geesh. Couldn't i get by without having to make a trip to Starbucks and getting a salted-caramel hot chocolate? Geesh.

*Today I realized words hurt.

*I like video games. They require fun without thinking!

*I am getting my hair done tomorrow. Thank goodness! Getting your hair done makes you feel like a new woman!

*We are seriously thinking of getting a new puppy. We all want one but aren't sure how Jake will do. We want this kind

*Said dog is totally adorable..... Totally!

And with that friends, I am off to scrap, workout, hang with Alyssa, and smell the crock-pot chili that's a cookin'!

Seattle.

What a really fun time we had!

The drive was nice. The weather was nice. We laughed a lot. Listened to 1/2 of the entire collection of Narnia CD's from FOTF {that's Focus On The Family}. It was a lovely time.

I have to share with you about our hotel... What an experience. It was a decent hotel, not like the Marriott or anything but it was nice. However there was a convention going on, Burlecon to be exact. While I have nothing against this kind of thing {to each is own}, the swimming pool happened to be in the middle {weird I know} of the hotel. So the lobby was in front, the pool in the middle, and the hotel rooms at the other end. So when we were swimming, all the wonderful and expressive Burlecon peeps passed by the entire time. In fact, the entire hotel was over-runned with Burlecon peeps.. So that made staying there quite interesting to say the least! Ha.

Here are photos from our lil' trip!

Even though we've been to Seattle many times, we hadn't been to a couple of places. The Space needle was interesting. We were all packed into the elevator like sardines, which I didn't appreciate. Then taken up how many ever feet and released. I felt icky riding up, and we all later learned our equilibrium's were off for whatever reason. While it was cool to go in the needle and experience that, I could of done without the 47 bucks it cost to do so... But it was a lovely day out and I got some decent shots!

Pike's Place Market was cool. Loads of people, beautifully colored flowers, veggies, and merchandise were at our fingertips and eyes. It was fun seeing them throw fish. We ate at a local diner and just about every menu had meals for vegans/vegetarians which was nice. The first Starbucks was cool to go in, it is small as I had heard and not that grand which I also heard. But I bought a coffee mug that said "first Starbucks" or something like that. I am going to take it to work and use it there {oh and the drink we got was pretty good too, so go Seattle's first Starbucks}!!!

Oh just so you know, the top food photo is hummus, of course! And D&A split this really tasty veggie burger!

Normally I'm not a big city girl. Nope. In fact, I try to go as far away from cities as I can possibly get. But this past weekend was fun and worth it! I wanted to do these things since the 4 years we've been living here and I'm glad we did them!

Take any trips lately? Any place you long to go too? Share with me.

Sketchabilities Sketch #33 Reveal

Since joining the Sketchabilities team, I've been a busy beaver scrappin' and

it sure feels great!

So here is the newest sketch {#33} that I got to play along with as my very first sketch with the team!

This photo was taken on my girlie vacation with Melissa and Sarah last year. I took the opportunity to use this photo and do a layout about how I am relying on the Lord instead of myself and that process.

supplies used: CM corner rounder; American Crafts I Do Collection; American Crafts Thickers; Computer font Century Gothic; American Crafts pop dots; Making Memories letters; American Crafts cardstock; American Crafts Flair.

Go on over and try the sketch out yourself, you'll find your mojo flowin' in no time!

I can tell you this...

I haven't had this much fun scrappin' in a very long time! I am really enjoying the challenges that I've been doing over at ACOT. Such inspiration! Here are a few more.

I have a very busy Thursday night tonight! Gotta take A to theater and then come home and clean the house! We're leaving early Friday morning for Seattle so I want to be sure that house is tidy-idy!! We're so excited to be getting away! We're literally a block from the space needle! I sure hope we can see it from our hotel window, how cool!

Grateful list:

1. Scrapbooking.

2. Family decisions that we make together.

3. Sleep.

4. Long hot showers.

5. The Lord's guidance.

6. Knowing that even though I might be or want to be short with a customer who is rude, that God loves them too..

7. Funny Carney-isms.

8. My doggies.

9. Friends who make me laugh.

10. Not having to wake up to the alarm.

Have a wonderful weekend friends! Be blessed.

The day.

The sun is shining. A finished school on time, we did some really new science experiments, I got scrapping goodies, new challenges, and I even ate my yummy hummus/cracked pepper triscuits. The day rocks!

Another challenge that I did this past weekend on ACOT was to follow an ad challenge. I normally pick the neat colors out of an ad challenge, but this time I really liked the idea of doing my project to that of their photos. Here is the ad:

and here is my frame. I bet you can guess, i made it for our room! I hung it up right after I took a photo of it! D&I both love it!

Some things have been going on in our lives recently. The biggest one is a huge revelation about our current church. While we love our church a lot and there are many good things about our church, we've decided that it is time to possibly find a new one. I had a friend the other day seal the deal for me {and they probably don't realize it} because they suggested that we stay on God's course for us. I went into some serious prayer as did Dayv and we realized that God isn't just in one place and the place we are currently at has come to an end. If we leave, God will be where we go. Our path and purpose is to follow God. Sometimes this means we might possibly confuse others or hurt them too. But in the call of obedience, it is important to do just that, be obedient. We are still in prayer about it all to ensure that we are aligning ourselves with Christ. But for now, we have a few churches in mind to go and check out! We are excited about finding something that not only the Lord will have us work in, but one in which we really feel like we're part of a family. Please pray for us in this journey. Thank you.

We are going to Seattle for our anniversary {I took off Fri-Sun and D got off Fri} and we're taking Alyssa! I know that sounds really weird, but with going on our mini romantic vacation just recently we kinda figured it would be a really cool to have a family get-a-way. We're only actually going one night, but its nice to get away! We're going to see the space needle, pike's market, the first Starbucks, and other things while we're there! We're using it as a field trip and Alyssa will take her camera and then come home and give us a summary of what Seattle was like. We've been before, but we've never done the things we are going to do! So exciting!

I got my Xmas goodies in the mail! So... When will it get here so I can scrap with them! I also bought a honkin' huge punch from Marvy that was a snowflake too. I have snowflakes on the brain! I got a really good deal on it, so I went ahead and got it! I am SO excited! We decided to do a cut down your own tree again this year. We did it one year when we lived on base and will do it again this year too!!! So fun.

Well I'm off to enjoy the evening with my fam! Go enjoy yours too!

A colorful weekend.

Friends I hope your weekend was blessed!

I am enjoying the days of rain, family, and scrappin'!

I just scrapped for me this weekend.

I found mojo on this new site I joined:

A Cherry On Top

They have really great October challenges going on as well as they are a very welcoming and friendly bunch! If you're looking for inspiration or a great scrapbooking home, go check them out!

I did this one for their color challenge. It was to use 50% orange.

Course I had to throw in one of my favorite colors to make the orange pop! I like how it turned out.
supplies used: American Crafts, CM corner rounder, Imaginisce, KI Memories, Orange Sharpie, Offray ribbon, Computer font Century Gothic. Most of the supplies were from the Life Preservers September kit.

I wanted to share with you because now I can share the good news! Dayv got the job! Thank you praying for us. We feel so blessed for him to be able to go into a job like this and are prayerful this means that for the next 3 years he won't deploy much. Please pray for him and his PT {physical training} test he is to take at the end of this month, the shift preferences {we'd love days}, and for the Lord to show Dayv his purpose in this position.

Ya know what's cool I have off today and Friday! I took the entire weekend off because it is D's and my 15th anniversary {well its on the 17th}. Believe that! 15 years of being married. Who would have thunk? God is an awesome God!

Well folks. D&I are having a HP marathon on the Wii while A does school, cleans the blinds and picks up the poop in the backyard! Since she's decided that when we ask her to do something she says, "I know" or "okay I'll do that" and then never does.. So oh yeeaaahh... Teaching her that listening far outweighs not. Hee. Hee.

Happy Monday folks!

Please take the time.

I really want to share this with you that I found recently. It gave me goose bumps and understanding, even in the 8 minutes of this video.

I will be praying, will you?

Happiness!

I didn't want to leave today on a sad note about my mom. It was a really nice day! My package came with my new stuff and I got my new Life Preservers kit stuff! I am in my pj's playing with it all! I feel crafty!!!!

My grateful list:

1. While I love the military and what it stands for, I do not understand why Dayv has to stay on base for days. We live 5 minutes away...? All for an exercise.
2. Bright colored paper because it makes me happy.
3. Finally found fabric I liked at Hancocks! I made the last 2 pillows for our bed.
4. Talking to MFW peeps on the phone to help with Alyssa and the new direction we are taking for homeschooling {upping some of her classes for harder stuff}
5. Sleep. I used to think it was a waste of time, now I cherish every. single. second of sleep.

6. I am the proud owner of this punch. I couldn't resist.
7. I am thankful of my job. But in the next 2 weeks {counting this week} I will only have 1 day off. I am not complaining because even though honestly it sucks, my paycheck will rock!
8. Rainy days. I love them. They always seem to come when my mood fancies it.
9. Praying with my friend Lori. I probably don't say it enough to her or could possibly show her to the extent of how blessed I am by her friendship, but I am. If you're reading this Lori you must know that even though the Lord set about the motion to have me show you many things, your role was being the perfect friend for me! I love you a lot!
10. Dayv coming into work and spending time with me made my day bright. I love that man!

Tonight as you read this or whenever you do, be reminded that we have much to be grateful for. No matter where each of us in life is, we can find something to be grateful about. My prayer friends is that you find that and grab a hold of it like it nothing else!

Happy night! I am off to continue playing with my new scrappy stuff!

10.8.10

2 years.
Here and gone.
In a blink of an eye.
Where did it go?
I do not know.
And it still feels the very same,
I can hardly believe that she's gone.

It just doesn't seem very real to me at all.
I can't tell you enough how I still think to call her.
To want to share things with her.
We still talk about her. Laugh with her.
I miss her and the pain is still very real.
Only after 2 years it is quite different now.
The ache is gone but it replaced with the
rawness of not having her here. Yes the signs of her
being with Jesus still come and flutter, but the reality
of her actually not being here is a mystery to me.
I can't grasp it. Honestly it doesn't seem very real to
me and I frankly still don't like it.
I still don't understand. I don't know if I ever really will.
Mom I miss you more than I could possibly say.

Seriously.

I could eat this

and this

every. single. day. hands down. It's that yummy! If you've never tried it, do so right now!

I just ordered this

because even though I'm not ready for Christmas I am "thinking" about it!

and I also ordered this because even though I am WAY behind on getting one of these I don't normally do punches but I finally broke down because I am in love with this punch, I will admit it. I also want the new snowflake one, but it wasn't available online.