In the 16 years.

D's been in the military I've hardly gotten any photos of him while he's
been deployed.  However times are changin'!
Sure enough one night while we were talking, he said that he and
another guy made a pact to take photos of one another because
I think his wife was like me, and never had gotten any! So he suddenly
starts sending photos one after the other. You can imagine my
surprise that he's actually keeping this pact with his friend and as
many as he takes of his friend, his friend takes of him. So I was sitting
there smiling at each and every one because well... After all it's only
been 16 years since I've actually seen my husband work. LOL.

And because of that this is what I created about my guy!

I can't tell you enough with each one he sent I just smiled and
smiled. Its yet another moment that makes me feel so close to him.


On Sunday we got the opportunity to chat video with one another
again! I LOVE those moments. I know I keep saying that but I am
sure friends that you understand!  We didn't talk for long but it was fun
talking to him and laughing with him.

I feel so blessed beyond words by that man.

I hope you are blessed beyond words by your man too.

Where its at.

I don't have anything scrappy to show you.

I don't have anything witty to say either.

We're just moving along.

Do ya ever feel like that too?

Where nothing changes, everything else does because you move along daily in life?

I guess I can do some updates!

I put a count down ticker on the bottom of my blog because having one on the fridge isn't enough! I am ready for D to come home, like today!

We're started homeschooling already! Who knew. We knew we were going to start with math because A is a tad behind and we're Singapore Math. We needed to get started on that straight away since its very new to us. But we also added in our Spanish program. We didn't go with Rosetta Stone this year because A is only in the 8th grade. So we bought the program called Instant Immersion for a much cheaper price. We thought this would work best for now and then we'll see for next year. It's going well. We cover a lot of work in math in one day, but it is review so thus far A isn't complaining!

After much stress {for over a month now} I am finally able to say that I'll only be working as a regular barista in the fall. My decision didn't come lightly however, my job and priority is Alyssa even if I felt led to continue to work. It wasn't working out with me keeping on being a foreman and trying to homeschool too. So after much prayer, which I have to share that the Lord answered 10 fold I am going to work M-F 730-1030. I am going to go to the gym early in the morning before work, then go to work and come home and we can start school. It also allows someone who really needs me foreman job the chance. It also allows me to continue to work and bring in extra money as well as get off early enough to start school with A. Its a total win-win situation for everyone and that is exactly what the Lord showed me. I am very excited that September 1, I will be a regular barista!

We video chat with D every Tuesday as his days are set lately. It's been a HUGE factor in less stress for me as well because again I feel like we're together even though we aren't. I cannot thank technology enough...

I am not the least bit sorry I added sugar back in. I am not eating straight out sugary things like candy and horrible stuff because I am trying to stay away from it. A&I made another batch of the cupcakes I posted a few weeks back and tried a couple of different things this time around. We added more milk this time around to help make them softer and creamer, which worked. Next time though, we'll not use as much nutmeg as its a little too strong. Even though they are sugary, its good stuff for you. So we made enough to pop in the freezer for when we need something sweet.

A has been going to the gym with me now for almost 2 weeks. It's been interesting but she is loving it a lot! I finally got back into my serious routine and it felt good!

Well we're about to head out!
Hope your weekend is grand!

I am always grateful for so many things. But this week my gratefulness is filled with love. Such a small word for such a big meaning.

Food. Glorious food.

I have to share this recipe!!! It's totally yummy and so easy to make!
{sorry for the funny photo, I had begun eating my soup and realized I hadn't taken a photo of it yet! LOL}

Tangy Vegan Crockpot Sweet Potato Corn Chowder

Ingredients

2 cans whole kernel corn

3 cups vegetable broth/stock

3 sweet potatoes diced

1 large onion diced

1 clove garlic minced

2 red chile peppers minced

1 tbl chili powder

2 tbl salt

1 tbl parsley

black pepper to taste

1 3/4 cups soy milk

1/4 cup organic butter/margarine

1 lime juiced

Directions

Place corn, vegetable stock, potatoes, onion, garlic, chili powder, salt, parsley, black pepper in slow cooker. Cook on low 7 hours.

After that is finished cooking, pour the mix into a blender filling pitcher halfway. Puree in blender until smooth. Then pour into the crockpot. Once everything has been pureed stir in soy milk and butter/margarine. Cook on low for another hour. Add lime juice.

Some things to note

I didn't add the red chile's. I didn't think it needed any more spice. Also A doesn't do well with too spicy stuff so I didn't want to take the chance.

I used cream corn because it is what I had on hand. You can't even tell once it's pureed the difference between regular or creamed.

You can use regular potatoes if you wish, I used sweet potatoes because I don't normally eat regular potatoes.

I also didn't add the lime juice, it was fine without it.

This recipe was VERY good! In fact, it made so much we ate lunch on it the next day and then froze the rest! I love this soup!

A really cool side note! Julie my new friend and cool chick featured me on her blog.
Go check it out! I am honored, thanks Julie!!!!

Cherish.

The other day was such a treat for me! D&I got to spend much needed time on IM. 

In fact, we chatted for almost 3 hours doing typing and being able to "see" one another. Its been one of the few times that while he's deployed we've been able to do that and I truly cherish it!

I didn't get a lot of sleep though! I managed to stay up until 3:30 and had to get up at 4:45! But you can bet that I had a spring in my step pretty much all day because thanks to IM it felt as though D&I were together hanging out. It was much needed. Very much needed indeed.

While we were talking, he sent me this new photo of him at work so I thought I'd share it too!

I am totally in love with this man, he completes me in a way I never thought possible and I am very thankful for him. Blessed by him. Cherish him. 

Yeah, after 14 years, we're still very much in love! What a huge testimony to God's plans!

My cup is truly filled with the greatness of modern technology to be able to chat online for hours and hours.

Ah! It's almost as if I can make it another 86 days... *sigh*

Hug your man today and cherish him too!

What I have learned. What I am learning.

i've learned that cutting sugar out completely means that it is all I will think about, seriously. So I gave up trying to cut it completely out. Because in truth I spent more time thinking about it, wanting it, than I would normally do on any given day that I do have sugar. I am still going to eat "healthy" sugar because it is better for me, however eating no sugar seemed rash to me. I can live without meat but honestly, sugar? I think not.

I've learned that I need to practice what I preach. Which is to talk to the actual person you are having issues with instead of allowing it to harbor. I finally talked to someone recently and was very honest, which afterward I felt released.

I've learned that even as being a girl who calls herself a Christian that I am still prone to being tempted with my past. But with accountability I can conquer it.

I've learned that I am not perfect and yes, when something happens like pressing on my breaks really quickly because the person in front of you slams on their breaks that the word "shit" flies out of my mouth. And yes it's an oxymoron from the fact that I don't like cussing, I don't. Remember I am not perfect.

I've learned to seriously trust the HS within me because 99.9% of the time its spot on.

I've learned that no matter the image I know that God created me is, I will always be flesh when looking in the mirror and not liking certain things about myself.

I've learned that in order to actual heal with someone that your not close to anymore, that you need to actually open yourself up so that they can too.

I've learned that the pain of loosing my mom does lessen. However, there are days where it hits me so strong I can hardly breathe. 

I've learned that I have huge respect for people that are single people who are either parents or not and have to always do it by themselves. Because having D deployed makes me realize how good I have it, seriously.

I've learned to pause prior to speaking to Alyssa because it is effective. And I've learned to walk away too so that I don't say something horrible.

I've learned that you will  never make everyone happy but yourself.

I've learned that even as time moves on the ache you feel from loosing a loved one will forever remain.

I am learning that I need to cherish where I am in life even if that means a valley at this time. Instead of wanting to run through it, I am trying to learn to walk through it and be in the moment of it to learn from it.

I have learned that it is just not that big of a deal to worry, even though I constantly do.

I have learned that laughter truly makes your heart light.

I am learning that even though you might be many miles away from someone it doesn't mean that they aren't thinking of you.

I have learned that it is important to actually listen to someone rather than feeling the need to cut them off and speak.

I am learning that change occurs whether we like it or not, it is how we deal with it and our attitude that helps determine the course.

I am learning to embrace all of myself, even if there are areas where I don't particularly like.

I have learned that friends really do want to be there for you no matter what season you are in because they are your friends.

I learned that I am extremely hard on myself and am learning to let go of that.

I am learning I don't always have to have it together, because a lot of the time I don't.

I am learning that simple is what is best.

I have learned to be content.

I am learning to grow.

And most of all, I am learning to change the way I see things from my own eyes, into the seeing them from the Lord's eyes.

What have you learned or are learning in your life today?

Busy. Busy. Busy.

I had SO much fun this past weekend scrapping! It felt good to get out supplies and just go to town!

I pretty much at all of these kits that I hadn't scrapped from Studio Calico {and some American Crafts thrown in}. So I brought all of them out and put them together to make this really huge kit and scrapped just from that all weekend!

What a good weekend it was! On top of scrapping, A&I worked our tails off in the yard both front and back, we cleaned the house, did laundry, spring-cleaned my bedroom, bought groceries, worked out, played GOLF {the card game}, walked the dogs too. We had a fun and lovely weekend!

I hope your weekend was as pleasant as ours was! Here is to a wonderful week this week!

reading outloud.

In my search for home schooling materials I've come across something that I truly thought was awesome!
We've done it before with other books, but this time around we're reading classics.
Out loud.
We took a trip to our local library the other day, it turned out to not be so great so we decided to head over to the library on base. It was MUCH better! And it was there that we found the books we were looking for.

The Diary of Anne Frank.


The Swiss Family Robinson.

Treasured Island.

Alyssa wanted to start with Treasured Island. So that's what we did last Sunday. We sat down and started reading. There were a lot of smiles of course because one of the most favorite Carney movie is Muppet Treasure Island {so there are a lot of references of course}!! We read many chapters and she begged to read more but we held off until later or another day.
What a wonderful way for us to connect and learn about good classics like these!
Reading out loud is a great way for family time or family connections too! We've done this with several books before too.

Do you and your family read out loud, how did it go?

This week.

This week's gratefulness list:

1. For getting off of work at 1130am daily!

2. Salad. I love salad!

3. God connecting me with an old friend.

4. How badly my body aches from working out! Because I know it's working and here's to a tighter butt! :)

5. Drawing close to God even at work where God isn't invited.

6. Color. Because when I look at something that is colorful I am inspired and I simply cannot imagine a world without color!

7. Sitting in the book shop on the floor reading about recipes I want to try!

8. Long hot showers.

9. Cardstock. Clean, fresh, cardstock. It makes me want to create!

10. Finding a scrappy home where I am just me.

11. Reading out loud with Alyssa.

12. Not being discouraged when a meal doesn't exactly turn out like I planned. It just gives me vigor to try try again!!!!

13. Pouring down rain with thunder, oh how I miss that in Florida!
14. Grateful that when A gives me some serious attitude that I just simply tell her I am done and walk away. I wished back in the day when my mom would yell or I'd yell back that one of us would just walk away. I don't have a temper, nor do we yell in this house at all however some days when A rolls her eyes at me, I just want to scream!!!! I walk away because I don't want to say something I'll regret but mostly I walk away because I will keep going on and on and on and on about whatever it is trying to get my point across... And that solves nothing. It has taken me years in my life to just literally stop and shut my mouth! LOL. So today I am grateful of walking away and for the Lord helping me to shut my mouth and not beat whatever subject to death...
15.  And in that same breath, lol! I am grateful that A comes to me and apologizes and so can I. Then we can start on a clean slate and communicate.
16.Organization.
17. Clean smelling clothes. Because when you work in a coffee shop and all you smell is coffee, which my friends smells so much better than it tastes.. You end up smelling like icky old coffee day in and day out. It is nice that Gain makes everything smell lovely!
18. When I first lay down in our bed. I love our bed.
19. This makes me happy!

20. Listening to A play her clarinet. Right now she's self-teaching herself how to play LOTR. I bought her the sheet music book to it since she loves the movies so much.

Today are you grateful for much? We have much to be grateful for!
Happy weekend all!

Secretly...

I have to share with you that A has a profound knack for writing poetry. She did not get this gift from me however, but there are people in my family that can dig as deep as she can.

I asked her if I could share them here on my blog. There are 3 that I will share over the course of time. I am so proud of her, but more so I wanted to cherish them forever...

Secretly.
By Alyssa Carney


Secretly, I wish
in the hours of the dark
though my dogs growl and bark
I secretly wish
for him to notice me

When I walk down the crowded halls
the girls talking, the boys playing with basketballs
I see him walking
talking to HER

I turn my eyes away
as I walk towards the month of May
find myself wishing he was there
by my side, it's too much to bare

My friends just say, "oh bother"
it's just another day
I keep it to myself
up upon my shelf
a red little heart for the love I have to give

but in my heat I say "he's not the one for me"
so I walk to class
with a smile staring out of the looking glass
but still, I secretly wish,

he was mine.




I asked her what she was talking about here. I think it's a little obvious :) it is in fact about a boy. 

Braces!

Our girl got her braces on!

She did super well and was totally ecstatic all day long!

We think she looks pretty cute!!! She got green and blue rubber bands too!

They told us that the changes will start happening right away and that the bigger changes we will be able to notice straight away too. I thought the entire process was pretty amazing myself!

Day1 of no sweets. It was easier than I thought it would be! I am determined to "try" very hard to stay away from sugar. Didn't even crave it today, PTL!

97 days.

Folks it's 97 days until D comes home.
And you know what else? It's been a full month since I haven't eaten a single bite of meat.
I don't even miss it, as you know from other posts. I don't think I'll ever miss it. Now
that I've realized the new healthy for me, it's time to crack down. No more sugar.

This is going to be a hard one for me. Because well...
I am a teetotaler. I am drinking organic Earl Grey with a splash of soy and 1/2 tsp of organic sugar.
Time to cut that out. ICK. How will I do that?
Everything has sugar in it, everything practically.
But I know that if I can get through a month of not eating meat and never
touching the stuff again, I can let go of sugar.
Instead I am going to try this and this.

I thought you'd like to try this recipe. I found it {photo courtesy of there as well} here.

Guacamole dip

Ingredients

2 cloves garlic minced
3 scallions minced
2 tbsp chopped cilantro
1/2 lime juice {I used kind already liquid in lime}
avocados
a pinch of salt

Directions

Break avacados up with fork
Cut up ingredients and add to avacado

*This called for jalapenos minced as well. But I don't like them so I omitted them. If you put them in, it calls for 1/2 jalapeno.
*I also didn't add the tomatoes like the photo calls for.
*I also added a tiny bit of organic salsa for flair!

This is my 2nd different guacamole recipe and I wanted to make them both to see which one I liked better. I like this one the best! Enjoy.

Hope your week is blessed with goodness from others to you!

I am.

Grateful this week for:

1. Doing nothing. Because days like that are something to cherish.

2.Remembering that I need to write things down is such a gentle reminder. I am grateful for this because I cannot remember anything w/o writing it down!

3. For thoughts and dreams of a quilt for our bedroom. It's actually a process that I plan to start soon! I am grateful for Tammy holding my hand through it all.

4.For being able to reach out to others and ask for prayer.

5. Rainy days.

6. Being able to take A to school. When I drop her off it makes me realize just one more day that homeschooling is the very best choice for our family.

7. Dayv working so hard.

8.Working together with Alyssa as a team.

9. A home that we can be proud of.

10. The Lord continually showing himself mightily even when I doubt. And doubt I do... *sigh*
11. Dayv finally moving back to where he was in the first place, we can talk again.
12. Admitting that I am having a very hard time w/o Dayv. Because others truly do care.

13. Nice evenings with a wonderful friend full of laughter, stories, and good food! Thanks Lori!
14. Doing what is right for our family, even if others do not understand it.

What are you grateful for this week?

Thank you and quilting.

So you don't think I'm so whacked out chick who asks for prayers and then never says a word after that...

I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your prayers. As I was at work yesterday, I felt a spring in my step and actually didn't feel so down. I truly love each of you for praying for me because I needed each one of them. It always warms my heart when I ask on here, and you do. I cannot express my gratitude. Of course that spring was cleaning and the two together made for a very fun day! Cleaning is therapy for me, nuts I am I know.

How much to share? I often share everything on here. It is after all my blog. But for the sake of others that are involved, I will just tell you that I simply have to live my life for who I am. Who my family is. What we are trying to achieve. Our beliefs. And sometimes in doing that we must distance ourselves. That means ending the drama. Doing what is set before me and staying focused.
Because in the end, it all goes back to I am not in control, the Lord is.
And no amount of worry or trying to take over will work or do me any good.
Even though I know this, it is still hard.

But thank you friends. Because you helped me to see that even though it is hard, the Lord has it all under control and isn't surprised in the least!

Okay...

Even though I am struggling in so many ways, there are small things that make me happy! This being one of them.....

I don't consider myself a quilter. Yet I have made many.

I made my first one for Alyssa.

Then came many. One for my friend Sarah's baby, one for my mom, one for Dayv, one for my gram, a wall hanging, and a really small one that hangs on a ladder.

But I have a love/hate relationship with sewing. Yet as I am writing this I am astonished at how many quilts I've actually made. It was a HUGE learning lesson for me with each one. It's been my desire though since I moved from England to here to make a bed quilt for us to actually use daily. I have this fantasy of living back in the day using a quilt nightly on a bed... And well I want to use it for ours too!

So here we are. I had been saying over and over I wanted to do this. Talked to D about it so much he finally asked me if I was actually going to create it or keep talking about it! LOL.

I talked to him about just doing the top and sending it off to finish the rest and he agreed. Although I am going to love creating the top, I cannot imagine me doing a queen size quilt on my little machine. And I don't want to sew it actually, it's too large. So even though I am going to send it off to be finished, I still think that I am making it because I am doing the top.. At least.

This way actually it takes pressure off of me to hurry through it because I have so much to do with it. I can take my time with the top and do a really great job. Not that I didn't with any of the one's I created. But... I want this quilt to ensure its lastivity. We are going to use it all the time. While the others use the quilt I made for them, they don't use it all the time. On top of this, I want to have the quilting part look really great and I honestly don't know how to "quilt" on a quilt if that makes sense.  

Back to my love/hate relationship. I don't like sewing. I am the girl that in Brownie's {GS} wanted to quit because we were doing a unit thingy on sewing. Mine as you can guess came out horribly. I hated sewing with a passion. But I would assume and share with you it had everything to do with my thoughts. I thought there is  more to life than sewing! I would rather have been playing outside something fun like fort, tag, or football.. Then in middle school during home-ec we had to sew again. Sheesh... Didn't they know at the time I was too busy being a tom boy? Come on people! That project was a shirt I believe and you can imagine how that turned out. So I vowed to never sew again. Ever. Then in college my cousin who lived with me at the time and I decided to re-cover our furniture. Umm. Well that involved sewing again. Pillows, the covers etc. Did you know that we ended up hot gluing them? LOL. Yep you read that right, hot glue. Smart huh?

Moving to England changed me really. In so many ways. But I shared with this wonderful woman Debbie, who I knew made quilts that I wanted A to have a quilt. You know that whole taking it with you thing when you married... I dunno. I thought she should have one. And making one was born out of love for her and the gentle guidance from Debbie. She walked me through every inch of that quilt. She would come to my house and we'd work on it and talk. I cherish that time, I truly do. And that quilt? It's prolly the most perfect one I've made! LOL.

Oh yeah and Alyssa loves it. Thank the Lord!

 So here I am still talking about it, lol! That's funny huh?

  

Well no more! I've picked out a pattern.

I am actually going to follow the colors and everything. Our bedroom is done in Americana.

Sorry for the photo, it's not very nice weather today. But yeah this is a glimpse of our room.

I made the Americana wall hanging you see {that one I did all by myself!!!}.

And there is our comforter that we have now, it's served its purpose because now its dull and time to replace!

I've got the pattern, I know the colors {true red, white, blue}, and I even have how to make it, along with how to measure creating a quilt for an actual bed. I've even got a friend Tammy, who is going to walk me through the whole process!!  The other day I went out and bought fabric to start off with! I am totally stoked!!!

How about you? Have you quilted? Do you sew? Got anything you'd like to share with me as I embark on this journey? Please share!

Please pray.

Please pray for my job. For my family. For direction. For me to let go and truly lay it down at the Lord's feet.

I feel lost. Hurt. Confused. Sad.

I keep trying to lay it all down and I simply just pick it back up. I am afraid I am doing an awful job of seriously letting all of this go.

So please pray for me.

yes I still scrapbook.

In spurts.
It comes and goes as of late but I have been off an on scrapping.

I recently participated in crop at a site and it jumped me into scrapping. I enjoyed myself so much scrapping. It was a lot of fun! And then it left again! But that's okay. I am enjoying the process all over again and am just taking it day by day at this point.
Aren't they all cute though? I love each of them. Sometimes I wished I had a room just to hang my creations because I love them so much!!!! LOL. Do you ever feel that way?

In my ever growing quest to find a scrappy home {the one with the crop is now closing}, I decided to go way back. Back to roots. I tell ya there is nothing like going home to where others welcome you with open arms. It's important to me to find a site that runs well, smoothly, and easily. I like it there. It's the only site I'm on. It's just to just be.

Well friends I hope your day is blessed!

Happy birthday, A little late.

Happy sweet birthday Alyssa!

With everything that happened in May, A ended up having her party at the end of May this past weekend. Both of her friends {Kati and Bree} could finally get together and come over for a sleepover.

I can hardly believe that it's been 13 years.
I remember the night I gave birth to you.
The night that dad unwrapped you to ensure
you were all there, in one lovely peace. He looked
up at me and said, we created this beautiful girl.
It was then I fell in love with you.
It was then I realized that I had been given a blessing.
I've gotten the opportunity to watch you grow
into a wonderful girl, and now a young woman.
Embarking on being a teenager. There is so much
that comes with it, but you are starting it with grace
and with the Lord. Such a difference from me to you.
That makes me smile. I want nothing more for you
Alyssa to live life fully. To continue to walk with Jesus.
To find the adventures you seek. To learn. To laugh.
To enjoy. To grow. To remain pure. To just be you.

I love you with all of my heart.

Mom.